Compassionate Confidence
Even if you’re not from the Midwest, you may be familiar with the term “Minnesota nice.” It’s a phrase that implies polite friendliness and an aversion to open confrontation. To be nice is about people pleasing in service of being liked.
So, what’s the difference between being nice and being kind? Being kind is behavior that’s thoughtful, caring, and considerate, but also strong, confident, and self-caring,” says Dr. Marcia Sirota, a psychiatrist and author of “Be Kind, Not Nice: How to Stop People-Pleasing, Build Your Confidence and Discover Your Authentic Self.”
Confident people celebrate their strengths, see their weaknesses as areas for development, and aren’t constantly doubting themselves.
Compassionate confidence can help you develop assertiveness, which is the ability to express yourself and your rights while also being compassionate about the opinions and rights of others.
I read an article in Harvard Business Review several years ago that stuck with me. It was about leading with compassion, and it highlighted the following brief definitions:
- Pity = I feel sorry for you.
- Sympathy = I feel for you.
- Empathy = I feel with you.
- Compassion = I am here to help.
In this way, compassion is an intention versus an emotion. How can we demonstrate compassionate confidence in ways big and small? In other words, how can we help? Also, let’s be kind to one another.
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